For parents, the holiday party season can be exceptionally challenging because of managing their children at parties. There is an abundance of sugar, stimulation, and gifts at holiday parties. While these are fun for a short time, it doesn’t take long before your overwhelmed and overstimulated child may start to have a meltdown.
Although child meltdowns at parties are common, they don’t have to be inevitable. Here are some ways to help avoid child meltdowns at holiday parties.
Prep Your Child Before the Party
Many meltdowns can be prevented by talking about the party plans with your child. Tell them who will be there, what games they will have, what food they can eat, when you will leave, and other basic details. If appropriate, set boundaries that might avoid a meltdown, like eating only two desserts or playing only one video game.
Dress your child comfortably for the party. If possible, dress your child in layers, since parties with lots of people tend to get warm and your child might want to take off that cute holiday sweater to cool down. Bring winter gear to play outside and leave it in the car. Then your child can join other kids outside without borrowing the hosts’ clothes.
If you’re attending a party without children or in a space not designed for children (like a work party), then you should bring along some of your child’s favorite books or toys to keep them busy. A tablet is another option, but should be used strategically, as removing the tablet could result in a meltdown
Feeding your children a meal before attending the party is another excellent party hack, especially for picky eaters. By feeding your child beforehand, you won’t be at the mercy of when the host serves food or what the host provides. Your child’s belly will already be full, and they won’t be begging for every snack or dessert they see.
Help You Child At the Party
On your drive to the party, have a cheerful last-minute review about your expectations. This will be the last private instruction you can have with your child, so keep it positive and concise.
Upon arriving at the party, set your child up with appropriate activities or children. Let your child know where you’ll be so they know where to find you. It may be helpful to give a timeline, such as “Play here for 15 minutes and then I’ll let you choose some food to eat” so your child knows what to expect.
As tempting as it might be, don’t check out once you’re at the party. Watch for cues that your child is getting irritable, restless, or tired so you can step in before the meltdown erupts! Bring your child to a quiet place and let them decompress by reading books or playing by themselves.
Although letting your child decompress in a quiet place usually prevents a meltdown, you need to stay flexible and do what’s best for your child. You might have to make an early exit before a full meltdown happens. This might be disappointing, but it avoids embarrassing yourself or your child.
Review After the Party
Your child may be overwhelmed and overstimulated after a party. The sugar, lights, and excitement can make it hard to unwind. Plan time to calm down by reading, taking a bath, or going on a quiet walk. Talk about the fun you had and memories you made together, and perhaps what they could do better next time.
If your child still struggled at the party, it’s imperative to not be harsh with them as you discuss what happened. Holiday memories are especially vivid, and you want your child to think of their childhood Christmases with fondness and not bitterness towards you. You can discuss needed improvement positively and cherish the happy memories you made together before a meltdown.